It has taken time and regular effort for me to develop a relationship with a Higher Power, a God I understand and can relate to. In early recovery, I struggled for a long time to gain a truly valid connection to a power greater than myself. Yes, time takes time, but at some point I realized it had become real. It had to become both honest and also be one of the most important things in my life.
It wasn’t until I was able to be honest and true to my Higher Power that I was able to achieve any meaningful spiritual growth.
Today that relationship is always within me and I have peace and faith in my place in the world around me today because of it. It has shown me how to enjoy and find meaning in life through participating in relationships with others. It reminds me to be aware of the folly of trying to possess things that can’t be possessed.
It has helped highlight the futility of trying to find happiness through consumerism and controlling others.
The gift of a relationship with a Higher Power has enabled me to learn how to find the peace I used to seek always in outside things and instead realize how lasting and sustainable happiness can only be found through the pursuit of inside things. It is a powerful truth that by turning my will and life over to a power greater than myself I have found a tremendous freedom and joy within myself. The “inside job” of recovery truly began for me only when I became able to trust and have faith in an outside source.
An excerpt from the book A Year of Days (12/25)